Hopefully this will break the conventional rules of volumes and leave this as a 1 volume set. Although this could also be filed under the Mother of the Year heading...
Anyway, here's my step-by-step instructions:
1. Don't make an extra set of keys when you move into a new place.
2. Turn the oven on to preheat for dinner (and by 'dinner' I mean a frozen pizza)
3. Decide to take a few boxes to the basement.
4. ***Most important direction*** When trying to make sure your adorable toddler doesn't follow you down the winding staircase to the basement, accidently shut the door the whole way until you hear the dead-bolt latch, leaving your toddler locked into the condo by himself, with the oven on, your keys and phone inside.
5. Sidenote: make sure your landlords live 45 minutes away and it's a snowy, icy night and make sure they're almost out of gas so it will probably take much longer than 45 minutes to come rescue you.
I will not tell you how within just 15-20 of the longest minutes of my life my new neighbor figured out how to get in. Then you would all know how to get into my house and you would come steal our 90,000 matchbox cars and oodles of train tracks. Just know everything was fine and Eliot is now deathly afraid of said neighbor.
And for those that need to know what a 2 1/2 year-old did in his 20 minutes as Macaulay Culkin, he knocked on the door and yelled "mommy?" and when I didn't keep answering it changed to "Katie? Where are you?", which turned into him thinking he was pretty funny. Big surprise.
5 comments:
ooo wow....you should make a movie and then you could makes millions of dollars and then you would have maids so if you DID lock yourself out then E would not be alone. Ummmm did you ever hear how Madi locked us BOTH in the bathroom in guatemala and there was no way out? yes and well the windows have bars so I couldn't climb out and the front door was bolted so no one could have gotten in to save us...lets just say a razor, barrette, roll of paper, nail file, a broken nail clipper, and scissors...45 min later and all the while madi saying ooohhhh uh ohhhh the whole time...we made it out ;)
oh. my. goodness.
stop doing that.
Wow. How scary. I think this tops my locking of Will in the car. Thank God Eliot's alright. Another notch on the what-makes-us-stronger-mothers belt perhaps? Or maybe just more paranoid =). Hope the move is going well...
Gina
OK...I tried very hard not to laugh about this because if it ever happens to me, I'll be 1. in a complete panic and 2. mad that I ever laughed at someone else's mishap, but your humor is hysterical and I couldn't contain myself. Glad everyone made it through the ordeal safely!
totally cracking up! i did the exact same thing when the baby was less than a month old. It was pouring rain and i had to run over to the landlords to get the key. The door was locked all of maybe 7 mins and when i got in i was crying hysterically, only to find none of the kids even knew (or cared :) i hadn't been there - ha!
Post a Comment