Tuesday, March 31, 2009

When in doubt...

Post pics of Eliot. When he has no teeth.

Saturday, March 28, 2009


I started a Twitter account in attempts to understand what all the hype is about. Still confused. Anyone in love w/ it that can help me get the value? Other than updates from people in hospitals and such, what's the point? Help me understand, peeps.

Earth Hour! Who's in?

This entry stolen from Here:

A little less than a year ago millions of people all around the world made a bold statement of concern about climate change by doing something quite simple - turning off their lights for one hour. Earth Hour.

Last year during Earth Hour 2008, more than 50 million people in more then 400 cities around the world turned off their lights to demonstrate their commitment to joining this global movement to encourage the world the world to take action.

On Saturday March 28th at 8:30 p.m. Earth Hour 2009 will take place.

Earth Hour started 3 years ago in Sydney, Australia. Earth Hour happens once a year for one hour, it is a chance for us (people) to act globally and speak up for the earth. Last year 36 million Americans participated in Earth Hour and turned their lights out for one hour.

I would encourage everyone to take a few minutes and check out the following web site(s) www.earthhour.org or www.earthhourus.org . The web sites offer activities for your students, community, family, and businesses. Help spread the word and become one of millions who participate in this years Earth Hour.

Wednesday, March 25, 2009

While the husband's away...

I'll find me anotha man. Yeah, that's right. Isn't he dreamy?

Monday, March 23, 2009

By the way

In the midst of our ten-hour, toddler and mommy drive, I had just about made the decision to start using the old school phrase 'emory board' in place of 'nail file' from now on when Eliot burped quite loudly from the back seat. Before I could say anything he said, "What sposed to say? squuse me."

Saturday, March 21, 2009

Beauty of Facebook

Last night was the longest Arbonne party I've ever had. The actual "Arbonne" part didn't start until after 9:30 even though the invitation read 7:00pm. I didn't get home until after midnight.

My friend Amy (in yellow) decided to invite a bunch of our old high school friends. We all brought old pictures and Amy got out her yearbooks. Memories came out that were buried somewhere that made me about pee my pants. I can't really explain how great this whole evening was. At one point another Amy said, "This is the best (and worst) Arbonne party I've ever been to!" This is a serious business, people.

All this to say, thanks to facebook for making this possible. I haven't talked to some of these girls since high school. It's been fun reconnecting over FB and now to get together in person after all these years. All these years. We old. And according to the pictures in the room last night, the 30's have been kinder to us than our scrunchy-wearing teen years.

Thursday, March 19, 2009

God is.

He is. He is crazy. He is brilliant. He is good. Only God would use a silly blog to bring glory to his kingdom.

First of all, thanks for all the encouragements and prayers. You have touched our hearts so sweetly. Secondly, for those who sent private emails sharing your story, thanks for being so vulnerable and I promise to respond. The timing is a bit crazy as I need to get this kid ready for a trip to see the grandparents.

This time I"m hoping to not break any laws! I'll keep you in the loop.

Tuesday, March 17, 2009

Psalm of lament

Once a week Eliot and I head off to "school". We're actually going to our church's women's teaching ministry where I have real adult conversations and Eliot goes to play with his friends and learn about Bible stories. It's been a great fit for us. This semester we're studying the Psalms of the Bible. Each week has focused on a certain theme throughout that book of the Bible and some history behind it. It's been educational to say the least. We're blessed to have such a ministry available to us.

One theme is titled 'The Psalms of Lament' and these are focused on the particular chapters that deal with David (or whatever author) being discontent with God's response to a plea, feeling deserted or ignored or punished by God but through the process of honesty, coming to a stronger trust than ever in God's plan.

A couple weeks before that lesson, one of the leaders called to ask if I (along with a few others) would be willing to write a psalm of lament in my own words about our adoption journey, knowing it was such a beast. I agreed but as I thought about it, the infertility was fresh and painful. If I was truly going to be honest with this commitment, my direction needed to focus on where I'm at right now. My heart was raw over this and I could think of LOTS of things to write about my disappointment on this issue. The adoption journey seems happy now since there's a little Mayan squeezing my neck. So, I sat down one afternoon and started typing. I feel a little exposed putting it out there, but for what it's worth, here's what came out:

How long, O Lord, How long?
Hear my heart’s cry, acknowledge my constant stream of tears even though I am too weary to cry
How long will you keep me on this road, in this valley?
Lord, my arms are full but my couch is empty.
Do you plant a desire in the depths of my heart only to dangle it just out of reach?
With a simple decision between two, a life is created
for those surrounding me.
ALL around me, All the time
Yet we’ve prayed, wept, clung, wrestled, bled,
wondered, trusted, mourned, dreamt, pleaded, failed, offered, paid, grieved, encouraged, hoped and praised.

I thought by now you would have reached down and brought glory to your kingdom through our fertility, that you would have stepped in and answered the prayers of so many over so many years, but our couch is still empty.
Do you hear Hannah’s cry in me?
Do you feel Jacob’s wrestling from me?
Do you see Sarah’s doubt in my laughter?
I am armed for a fight but unsure of who my opponent is since You are the Giver of Life.
How do you choose when to bless and when to ask us for patience?
How do I find your unfailing love in this? It’s bigger and deeper but I can’t find it.
Can I humble myself and praise you in the mire or give in to the confusion and disappointment?
My broken heart is failing me and I feel as though I need to remind you that You don’t know what you’re doing with my life.
I want you to see this my way, not yours.
Lord, I am so tired, so weary, so thirsty.
The pain is real, it is never distant,
But... you aren’t either.
You are holding me tightly though I push against you.
Though there is no physical sign to hope in, yet my hope is in You.
Day and night I am surrounded by your blessings.
Your mercies are new every morning, your promises and your ways always on my heart.
No matter what the journey brings, You are my prize
You are my reward.
You are forever gracious and good.
You are good, Lord, you are good.
You weep when I weep.
You hold me together when I feel broken.
You pour your living water over my cracked and peeling dreams,
dreams that are as close to your heart as mine.
You remind me that even in a fallen world, you will be praised.
When my lips fail me, your spirit holds up my arms in worship.
Even though I can’t find it, I trust in your unfailing love.
I will wait for you Lord.
In this valley, I will trust.

Monday, March 16, 2009

Can o' worms

I posted about this topic a couple times before which makes me hesitant to post on it again. However, I've been learning a bit about myself through this process. While my journey falls under "fertility challenged" yours might be "adoption challenged" or "job challenged" or "soulmate challenged". So, instead of assuming that I'm not INSANELY GRATEFUL for the wonderful husband and amazing son I already have, try to apply your unfulfilled desire to my thoughts.

This struggle for me is equal to the psoriasis on my right hand. Sometimes it flares up, is raw and unbearable and other times it's just part of life. A few times in the last couple months, our desire to expand our family has flared up like a hot pair of jeans from the seventies that can not be ignored.

Back in the fall, a simple picture explained a little bit for me. I'd recently had a conversation w/ an old friend about her infertility. She explained that her arms sometimes physically ache for a child to fill them. While mine sometimes ache because of my child and I loved her description, it didn't apply to our current situation. Then I saw it. A picture of a family of 6 (4 kids) was all huddled/cuddled on a couch with bowls of popcorn watching a movie. Aha. My arms are full but my couch is empty. That's my longing. A full couch. It finally had a name.

Now, let's stop for a minute. Please don't hear greed in that. I'm not your local Angelina or Octo-mom. If the Lord stops our blessings at just the 3 of us, that's what He decided is best and I'll be the happiest that way. However, I strongly believe that HE is the one who put the desire in our hearts to have a bigger family. Just like I believe that if you long to be married, that God placed that desire in your heart. Are we on the same page now? Same book at least?

People ask us all the time if we're 'ready' for #2, if we'll adopt again, if we'll try to have biological ever again, etc. Our answer is yes. To all of the above. Our timeline? Hmmmmm. We gave those up long ago. Along with flare-leg jeans.

I'm okay posting my honest thoughts because one day they will just be memories. One day I might even have to use birth control again and say "we can't this time" when offered a baby that needs a home. Just like posting things I want to remember about toddler-Eliot, I want to remember this journey. I trust that it won't always be this way and the times of celebration will be (and have been) that much richer if I can glean from all aspects, even the ugly times.

All this leads me to my post for tomorrow. I wrote something a while back and have gone back and forth on whether or not to post it. I think I'm supposed to put it out there for whatever reason.

Friday, March 13, 2009

Short changed.

Spring forward was the best deal for me as a mom of a young kid last year. Eliot "slept in" an hour for weeks. We don't need to get anywhere in the mornings so it worked out amazingly. Sunday morning he got up at 7:45 and we got really excited about sleeping in this week.

Not this time around.

Eliot seemed to have gotten the very.wrong.memo.

This morning he got up at 5am. Which, we all know, is really 4am.

I know there are bigger issues in the world but I needed to document this for those teenage years when 1pm is too early to wake up.

Ignore the cuteness.

Tuesday, March 10, 2009

More Mohr's!

Yesterday when Jodie sent me the link to our whole album she also sent me a deal for you! I was so excited to share that I haven't even brushed my teeth yet! I had to blog first. (priorities? anyone?)

For any of you (even if you're a lurker who doesn't even really know us) who have wanted to book a shoot with Jodie, she's offering $50 off the shoot fee if you're a new client. That's so great!! In my opinion her rates are already quite reasonable compared to her talent and now she's offering a discount! Email her at jodified At gmail Dot com or call her at 314-808-3425 and make sure you tell her you saw this to get your discount.

And here's some more of her work! Enjoy! (I included a few favs that she already posted on her blog. Also, we don't have the disc yet so there's more to come!)

For more of our spring shoot with Jodie, click here!


I had a nose bleed this morning and we just went through a time change.

We all know what this meant for Charlotte.

I'm sure it has nothing to do with a rather vigorous face-washing experience.

Monday, March 9, 2009


You know you're out of shape when during a 20 minute workout your 2 year old asks you about 12 times if you're alright.

"Mommy, you okay?"

"Mommy, you alright?"

Ouch. Double ouch.

I finished up my 11 days cleanse a day early. I'd like to say it's because I'm an over-achiever to fit 11 days into 10. Let's just say that's what happened.

I am still alive after 10 days of no carbs, no soda, no sweets, no coffee. Not only that, but I chose to have a salad for lunch today. Not because some schedule told me to. That's progress, people. There's hope for me yet.

However, my coffee and I were reunited. And it feels so good. (random song lyrics for those of you like Russ who have no idea why I just said that.)

and just for kicks...
a pic of SeƱor Smooth eating breakfast:

Saturday, March 7, 2009

Can you handle it?

Normally I would refrain from posting smut on my blog but I just have to say,

Jennifer Aniston, eat your heart out.

Thursday, March 5, 2009

Woman of the night

Bow chicka bow bow!

Confused as to why this incredibly hot couple is praising God's creation in a dark parking lot?

Click here.

Tuesday, March 3, 2009

Monday, March 2, 2009


God is big. Bigger than I could have ever guessed.

I've not had carbs in 6 days.

Or soda.

There's been food fantasies, don't think that I'm cured of my grease and salt-lovin' disease, peeps. Just know, God is bigger than fritos and my beloved mountain dew.

That should be a praise song. A song so powerful it may cause revival across the nation. Young and old.

I'll work on that.